Monday, October 27, 2008

The Witching Hour – That seemingly endless 4 hours of crying…

I was visiting some friends of mine and they have newborn twins girls (so cute), and they were talking about the witching hour. I had forgotten about that time from 6 to 10 (some babies are longer and some blessedly are shorter) where your baby seems inconsolable, and nothing you do seems to soothe or help. Ahhh, how time is kind to help us forget it. Here are some thoughts and ideas on what to do when you are in the middle of the witching hour.

Just hearing “you are not the only one” doesn’t always help in the heat of the moment but it can soothe your feelings to know that 40% of babies are found to have colic or colic tendencies. So in other words, you are doing a great job, it is not you. A long as your baby is safe, you are keeping a cool head, you are doing what you can as a new parent. Here are a few things to keep in mind…

First, this to shall pass, it may take longer then you want, but it will end. Some babies get over it in 2 weeks some take 8. I remember being told 6 weeks was the ‘magic number’ and I thought, ok I can make it 6 weeks, right. My son went on and on till 8.5 weeks (but who was counting).

Second, this is one time when people's outlandish advice/stories may actually help. Listen to everything and as long as you are comfortable with it (and it is safe for the baby) try it. My son slept in his swing for 4 months, my niece slept in her car seat for 3 months and another mom I know ran the hairdryer so often she finally recorded it and played it for her daughter for 3 hours a day. Stranger things have worked.

Lastly, below is a BIG collection of some other tips, tricks, advice, ideas, that I found on the web. Try one try them all.

-Breastfeeding a LOT, the theory is that in the evening babies need more food in smaller quantities, so let them nuzzle and feed all they want for those 3 hours. It may be a bit intolerable but isn’t it better then the crying?
-Putting the baby in the infant seat on top of a running clothes dryer. The shimmying and noise of the machine are supposed to soothe the baby.
-Running the vacuum cleaner/hair dryer / white noice near the baby. Have you ever heard the racket the baby heard while in the womb? It was noisy.
-Taking the baby into a silent, dark room and walking or rocking slowly, to remove as much external stimulus as possible.
-Taking the baby into a bright room with lots of background noise, to add as much background stimulus as possible. See what I mean about trying everything and then the opposite of everything…
-Putting on loud music. Try everything from Van Halen to Enya.
-Driving the baby around in the car. My son hated the car so this one was not an option for me but it works for other babies.
-Strolling the baby outside. This seems to be especially effective in cold weather, for some reason, just put a hat on them.
-Bouncy seats or swings, although some kids who like them at other times of day hate them in the evening.
-Walking the baby around in a sling, wrap, bjorn, mei tai, or any other body-carrying device.
-Gripe water, Chamomilla or other homeopathic treatments, or Mylecon drops.
-Infant massage – especially around the belly and intestinal area.
-Infacol -you give it to them just before you feed them and its supposed to reduce colic.
-Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp? He offers the "5 S's" which will soothe baby. Swing, Shhhhhh, Side/Stomach positioning, Sucking, Swaddling.
-One mom on a blog said this “lay her on your arm, tummy down with her head resting in the crook of your arm. I cleaned the kitchen and walked with her and a lot of the time she passed right out”
-For bottle fed babies some of these studies suggest the administering of a probiotic, such as Lactobacillus acidophilus or Lactobacillus reuteri, will improve the condition. Probiotics have been shown to improve other conditions associated with colic, such as lactose intolerance, necrotizing enterocolitis, and gastric inflammation. In addition to that probiotics have been shown to generally improve the health of children who take them. (wikipedia)
-Another tip from wikipedia: Many parents have also discovered a link between food and colic - and if the child is breastfed, it could include the food ingested by the mother. Dairy products seem to top the list as possibly problematic. It has been suggested that the mother eliminate all sources of dairy from her diet for a week and note any changes in her baby's condition (wikipedia)
-And yet another Wikipedia tip: There is also the theory that rubbing warm olive oil on the hands and feet, then rubbing the stomach with olive oil in a clockwise motion will cure colic. (wikipedia)
-Positions that keep the baby's tummy warm such as laying tummy down on a warm (not hot) water bottle or across the parent's lap can help with gas pains and cramping.
-Remember to relax yourself. If you are amped up your baby may pick up on that energy. If you can get 5 to 10 minutes away do so and go relax. Then when you go back you will be better able to deal with a crying baby. Babies will not break if you leave them in their crib to cry while you sort some things out. This is precisely why I made my Swaddling Mama CD, to soothe and relax the mama so you can take care of your child.


Good luck and good parenting!

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Thursday, October 23, 2008

Traditional Cake: Maple Bacon Cupcakes

Traditional Cake: Maple Bacon Cupcakes

Important Things Not to do when raising children

Raising a child is an awesome responsibility. Once you are a parent it becomes apparent how ill equipped you really are, and all you want is be the best parent you can be. I have done some research on some BIG (and I mean BIG) things of what not to do. So often you read about what to do, this once I want to focus the things you should not do to make sure that your family life remains as perfect as it should.


First of all you must appreciate the fact that children are innocent and they are immature. They are not able to understand if their parents pay more attention to any one out of them. As parents it is important to pay attention to all of your kids. Lack of attention may be destructive for the kids. You should not create this favoritism. The squeaky wheel gets the grease but don’t forget the one that runs perfectly without question. Ignoring that wheel will quickly create problems.



Secondly, do not discourage your kids – let me repeat do not dishearten your kids. Give them opportunities to excel, experiment and success. In the end they will be better kids and you will be the best parent you can be. For example, my cousin will not sing out loud to this day because her mom told her she could not carry a tune in a bucket. I know my aunt did not mean that “silly” comment to have the lasting effects it had, but it did. Help them to become more confident. If your kids will feel that you are genuinely interested in their lives they will actually feel at home with you and will be more cooperative. They will start talking to you and they will share their thoughts, hopes, fears, and dreams with you. That is the end goal to being the finest parent you can be.


Lastly, you may have very good reason for criticizing your kids about something because you think you are being realistic, but think about it from your child’s point of view. They may not be able to appreciate this. They may not be able to take it positively. If they are doing something wrong, discuss it with them. Tell them to correct themselves but in a way which is not insulting to them. Kids at any age are very sensitive. They are over emotional. Treat them with love and care, other wise they will start reacting in a negative way. You should not punish them for little mistakes, help them learn from them and move on. The best way to go about it is to talk to them. Discuss the problem with them. Half of the problem will be solved automatically if you make them believe that you are there to listen to them. Not doing all these above mentioned things will ensure you can be the parent you have always wanted to be.


You must give your family all due importance as this is the unit which helps you learn the most. This is the family unit which helps in molding your personality. These people are very important. Thus you should be careful about the way you behave with your family.

For more parenting secrets click here.


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Thursday, October 16, 2008

To Test for Gifted Program or Not? What do you think?

My cousin and I chatted about this one and I thought it was important to ask this question, should she have her daughter tested for the gifted program?

I will interject here that she was in the gifted program in school and I was not so we have both view points going into this dilemma. Plus, both her brother and my sister were in the gifted program. Apparently, in the smartypants tree, I just fell out of it.

My first thought is this, why do we call it “gifted”? Isn’t there a better term? Aren’t we all “gifted” in some way? I may be a MIT graduate but can I fix my car? I may be a gifted salesperson but does that make me a good sales manager? I may be as dumb as a stump but I can throw a 95 mile an hour fast ball, etc…

Perhaps we should stop labeling and just call it an advanced studies class, because that is what it really is. Then maybe, just maybe we can get beyond the first question of do I let my kid or insist my kid get tested. Test everyone.

How do you present it to that they are going to be tested in the first place. Second question is what happens when your kid doesn’t make it into the gifted program? How do you break this news to you child? Telling your kiddo they are not “gifted” sounds about as fun as slamming my finger in the door.

My cousin did not want her daughter tested, I think her exact words were “not only no but hell no.” She felt it did not offer much in the way of “real world skills” and didn’t seem to help her brother and my sister much when it came to motivation and application. I agreed, it almost seemed like it gave some of the participants in there an “I am gifted, I don’t have to work at it” attitude. Then when things got hard outside the classroom there was no application on how to function or study for that matter.

I will explore more in the next blog as I have a lot to say on this one… look for part two and here is a good link to how to increase your or your child’s IQ (to prep for the gifted test).


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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

How long does it REALLY take to lose that baby weight?

Well, it is different for everyone. Sadly there are people like me who didn't lose it till my kiddo was 3 years old. Then there are others, those women we love to hate, that lose it the day they give birth and walk out of the hospital in their old non maternity jeans.

For me the thought of being pregnant again was scary enough to send me to an IUD with hormones, my body does not do well on hormones. I gained more weight. Pulled the IUD after 2 years and started dropping some of the weight and I stress SOME.

It wasn't until I was going to try out for an audition that I really got my act in gear. I started running again, doing yoga, boxing, and tai chi (my new love). Started making my po
Linkrtions smaller, and really looking at what I was eating. You know what I am talking about - those 2 pm snacks of twix and milkyways, the sit in front of the tv and eat ice cream.

I am not a fan of starvation or denial I just cut back. And the pounds fell off. I don't believe food makes you fat - a LOT of food makes you fat.

Where did I find the time - believe it or not it is about making the time to exercise. I got up at 6 am to work out in the morning (and I am NOT a morning person).

Want a proven secret on how to lose that baby weight? Click here

Monday, October 13, 2008

Helpful Hints for Potty Training

So your child was showing all the signs of being ready to potty train but now, you started and hit a roadblock.

Explaining to your toddler that going potty is a normal process of life and everyone does it, even animals is not the answer but it is a start. However, kiddos don’t always learn by rational talk –some times they have to see it with you or perhaps other kids. Find some educational and entertaining videos of their favorite characters learning to go potty like Elmo uses the Potty. Be sure to involve other family members in the process and emphasize the importance of consistency during this process – it really does take a village. If you are comfortable let your kid see you use the bathroom and flush explaining the process as you go (it can be embarrassing but if it works – who cares?).

Make a special trip to the store and purchase new underwear with your toddler. Let them have a voice in what you get. The underwear will have much more significance if your toddler helped choose them.

Overalls, pants with lots of buttons, snaps or zips, tight or restrictive clothing and oversized shirts will all be an obstacle to your child during this process. Put these kinds of clothes away for the time being. Better yet let your child run around naked or at least pantless (weather permitting of course).

Try a strategy like using pull up and if it doesn’t work after a month it may be time to try something else. For my son it was better to not use pull ups because they were just like diapers, we let him go commando – worked like a charm (only pee at first we will talk poop later – that was a challenge all on its own). For our neighbor she found some “special” thicker underwear specifically for potty training online that worked really well. Remember, to be flexible and don’t be afraid to back off if your kiddo gets obstinate about going to the potty.

Remember all kids are different and not all of them will respond to the same thing. To get my son to poop in the potty it took a full year (and a lot of different approaches) after he could pee in the potty on his own. At this age kids have unrational fears that no matter what rational explanation you give they will hold on to it. Be patient and creative. To finally get my son to poop in the potty we cut a hole in the diaper for 5 days and each time the hole got bigger and soon enough he stopped asking for a diaper. It was something about the security of having a diaper on while sitting on the potty.

Praise your child for each successful trip to the potty for my son it was high fives and kisses, and comfort them when accidents happen and try to remain patient and calm when they do have accidents. Just keep trying and be creative.

Be the best parent you can be... click here

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